Consummating ...

Currently my favorite actual voice mail message:

"Hi, this is ---.  We just obtained our marriage license today and we're trying to see if you have availability today or as soon as possible, if we could go ahead and get it consummated."

Missed call ...

Actual message: 

"Hi, this is Love. I'm calling to see if you are available to perform a wedding today or tomorrow ..."

**Caller ID shows a Missed Call from Love. Story of my life ......

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I'm thinking if you don't know what to call it. You probably shouldn't be doing it....

Actual message:

"Hi, this is ---. I'm calling to confirm that you are scheduled on --- to officiate our, umm, I don't what that would be considered, but we're getting married with you on ---."


**Another one of those moments I'm glad it was a voice mail, and not an actual conversation or I may have said something like ... umm, yeah, it's called a wedding, duh. I'm scheduled to officiate YOUR WEDDING.

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Actual message:

"Hi, this is --, I'm wondering if you're available to do ... a what? ... (then I hear her talking to the fiance' presumably "Babe, what is it a wedding? Is that what it is?") ... okay, yeah, I'm wondering if you're available to do a wedding?"

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**I'm thinking, if you don't know what to call it.  You probably shouldn't be doing it.

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