Thursday, February 7, 2013

JUST US wedding trend ...

I don't usually post links to articles, but this one struck me today ~ so I felt inclined to write about it.

I have performed more than a few of these - funny how people mock them (and often judge what I do) when in all actuality, many of my weddings are what they should be about: the bride & groom ... not the reception, the guests, the invitations, etc.  That's what the celebration party should be for ....  I find the same people that judge these types of weddings are also the kind that prefer "the show" type of wedding.  I perform those as well.  The only difference between me and the church/synagogue/etc. weddings y'all attend - is mine do not include any form of religion.  Mine are SOLELY about the bride and groom. 

* your wedding day should be whatever you want it to be ~ don't do what is expected or what other people want or have ~ unless that is what YOU, the Bride and Groom, want.

Just my two cents.


'Just us' wedding trend: Couples ditch the guests

Getty Images stock
Bride and groom only? Some couples are throwing lavish weddings for themselves, without friends or family.
By Wendy Grossman Kantor, TODAY contributor
Marybeth Eustice had been engaged for six years, having repeatedly pushed the wedding date off. Whenever she thought about planning her wedding, she was overcome by stress. Even deciding who to choose for her bridesmaids seemed like a burden.
Then last November, the couple decided to finally get married — but not invite anyone.
"We just wanted it to be about us," said Eustice, a 29-year-old dental assistant from Orlando, Florida. "At big weddings, I noticed the bride and groom are entertaining the guests and don't get to spend a lot of time with each other — we love spending time together. And, it's really about [us] at the end of the day."
Weddings-for-two, as bridal planners call them, are a growing trend, says Kelly Karli, owner of Frosted Pink Weddings in Vail, Colorado. "It's been popping up more and more," Karli told
Less is more?
With the struggling economy, couples still want to get married — and they want more than a courthouse elopement. Brides want an expensive dress, a beautiful bouquet, a photographer and flowers. But one expense some couples are willing to cut? The guests.
One bonus of planning a "just us" wedding is that you have a lot more leeway in the budget, Karli explained.
"You're able to have a really great dinner and the best filet or the best wine," she said. "You're able to have the wedding that you want."
But the biggest bonus, she says, is that there's zero stress. They don't have to deal with a seating chart, feuding relatives, an uncle who can't eat what's on the menu, or a grandmother who hates the centerpieces.

MaryBeth Eustice
Of her fall nuptials, MaryBeth Eustice said "We just wanted it to be about us."

Courtesy Andrea Eppolito
Andrea Eppolito planned a lavish wedding at the Four Seasons Las Vegas for just herself, her husband, and her baby.
Las Vegas wedding planner Andrea Eppolito loves planning these smaller weddings so much she decided to have one herself this past fall.
"It's one of my favorite trends," said the 35-year-old newlywed. "It's about you, your life, your relationship, and what matters to the two of you. At the end of the day, it's what your marriage should be about."
Eppolito didn't want to have a big reception two months after having a baby – especially since her father isn't able to travel to give her away. But she still ordered an Ulla-Maija couture gown, had her hair and makeup done, booked a florist and selected a lavish menu at the Four Seasons Las Vegas.
Maybe in a year, she said, she'll throw a black-tie reception and invite all the friends and family.
"Then I'll wear a Vera," she says. "Or a Reem Acra."
'You're going to regret it someday'
Still, not everyone's family is on board with the trend. Elementary school teacher Amanda Mace's parents expressed their disappointment at not receiving an invitation.
"I'm their only daughter," said Mace, 33, of Elmira, New York. And although her dad wants to walk her down the aisle, Mace and her fiancé are exploring venues for a no-guest-wedding, ranging from Central Park to the Caribbean.
"My mom and dad's big concern is, 'we're worried you're going to regret it someday,'" Mace said. "I'm kind of a shy person. I don't need the spotlight on me... I want the memory of just the two of us."
Leigh McLeod, 35, watched her sister deal with planning a big reception. The more she thought about it, the more McLeod realized she wanted to be married more than to have an over-the-top wedding.
"I didn't want to wait," says McLeod, a 35-year-old assistant teacher from Columbia, S.C. "I just wanted to be with him."
Last October, McLeod bought a wedding gown, picked a bouquet — and the week after her fiance's divorce was final, they married, just the two of them.
While driving to their venue, McLeod received a text message from her sister with the message: "I'm jealous. I really wish I had done what you're doing."

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

** UPDATE From the Note to Self: Life's Lessons ... (the previous blog post)  **

And the calls continue ...

Hello ###, this is Mr. ### calling.  I left you a message the other day.  I wish you would get back with me.  ## and I have been getting in to some heated discussions.  And we’re just wondering what our options are at this point.  We’re not sure this is going to work.  We’d been having difficulties prior to the ceremony, and, we just, I don’t know, things were going along well. They don’t seem to be going along well now.  And, she’s got a fiery temper and maybe I’m stubborn.  I  would like you to call me back so we can find out - Is there a grace period that we can reverse the marriage ceremony.  I don’t understand.  Please give me a call.  Maybe you can help counsel me in some small way.  I know I sound like I’m panicking, but things aren’t going well.  So I would appreciate if you would call me back, preferably after hours because I can’t take my cell in to work.  If you call me at work, I’ll have to break away or something.  We’re both – we’re kind of stuck – maybe – I don’t know how to express it.  I feel ashamed and embarrassed about all of this and am maybe just not going about certain things in the right way" 

** For the record, he only wants me to call in the evening hours and I have not been available to do so yet ~ I'm not being mean, although there really is NOTHING I can do ... at this point they need to seek legal counsel re: an annulment if they have grounds, or a divorce - there are no "take backs" **

Monday, February 4, 2013

Note to self: Life’s lessons can be learned at any age, even in your 60’s.

Voice mail message: 

“Hi, this is Mr. ### calling.  You performed a ceremony for us on Saturday. I need you to all me back.  ### and I had a serious serious discussion Sunday. And we’re wondering if we made a mistake or not. That’s not to say that we’re not in love or anything like that.  But apparently the discussion got a little heated and words were said. And we were just wondering what the process is, if you haven’t submitted anything yet, for the possibility of revoking what we did. I’m almost embarrassed to say that and hopefully we don’t have to do that … But we would like to know what the process is in case we want to reverse our ceremony. …. We’re both a little confused.  We both have a very, I don’t even know how to say it.  But, please call me back.” 

**Note to Self (and to any brides and grooms to be): it is ALWAYS better to have the “serious serious” conversation BEFORE the wedding.

** FOR AN UPDATE - SEE THE NEXT BLOG POST - There are no take backs! **